I was sitting on my patio, relaxing after a long day of working at my computer and helping out an old friend. The back wall of my yard faces a road and sidewalk, so people out on their evening walk can look over the wall and see me. It kinda reminds me of the old days when people sat on their porches and watched people go by. (It’s too bad we don’t do more of that)
I raised my Waterford goblet to ‘toast’ them as I said hello. It was two women and one said, “oh, you’re having a glass of wine” as she smiled, maybe thinking about her own ‘happy hour’ coming up.
I smiled and said, “it’s champagne!”
The other one, without missing a beat, said, “Congratulations!! You must be celebrating something.” They both giggled a little and kept moving.
I sat there thinking, ‘Yes, I’m celebrating. I’m celebrating life. I’m celebrating this very moment. I’m celebrating because I’m here, just being me, and I’m happy with that.”
This is not about drinking, (but if you’re going to, I recommend champagne!) It’s about the ‘idea’ of champagne and how it changes the mood, instantly! How just thinking about it makes us think about celebrating.
It’s about how we can find something, every day, that’s worth celebrating. (any excuse to bring out the pretty glasses) The small moments in life, that add up.
So many of us keep looking for the Big Moments – the milestones, the blockbusters. And yes, those are wonderful too. But if we can notice the little things – the new grass, freshly fallen snow, a child’s giggle, your husband remembering to take the Kleenex out of his pocket before putting it in the laundry. (Do you see how there’s a lot to get excited about?!)
But sometimes we get caught up in living the day-to-day routine and forget to stop and enjoy the moments. Then we feel stuck and even a little frustrated because the days are slipping passed. I know, I was feeling that way too. But I changed some things in my life, and shifted how I look at my life as a whole.
Now, I look for any excuse to lift my energy, any small tidbit in my day that can bring a smile, and any excuse to pop open some bubbly, say “woohoo” and make a toast to life.
Hope this inspires you to notice the moments, and celebrate!
P.S. if you’re ready to make a difference in your life, and make your New Year’s resolutions actually work, sign up for a Diamond Discovery Session and Let’s Chat!
I received this as an email today. Not sure who wrote it, but I know it has an important message for all of us as sisters and as women.
A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her mother.
As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter.
‘Don’t forget your sisters,’ she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass.
‘They’ll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need sisters. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them.’
‘Remember that ‘sisters’ means ALL the women…your girlfriends, your daughters, and all your other women relatives too.
‘You’ll need other women. Women always do.’
What a funny piece of advice!’ the young woman thought. Haven’t I just gotten married?
Haven’t I just joined the couple-world? I’m now a married woman, for goodness sake! A grownup! Surely my husband and the family we may start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!’
But she listened to her mother. She kept contact with her sisters and made more women friends each year. As the years tumbled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her mother really knew what she was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, sisters are the mainstays of her life.
After more than 50 years of living in this world, here is what I’ve learned:
THIS SAYS IT ALL:
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don’t do what they’re supposed to do.
Colleagues forget favors.
Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girl friend is never
farther away than needing her can reach.
When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you have to walk it by yourself, the women in your life will be on the valley’s rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley’s end.
Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you….Or come in and carry you out.
Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters,
daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers, Grandmothers, aunts, nieces, cousins, and extended family: all bless our life!
The world wouldn’t be the same without women, and neither would I.. When we began this adventure called
womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other.
Every day, we need each other still. ~ unknown
Reach out to a woman you know and tell her how important she is in your life. I would love to connect with you and celebrate our sisterhood.
I wanted to share some thoughts I had about confidence.
I think the best way to become more confident is to become more competent.
What does it take to become competent at something? THE THREE P’s..
Make a PLAN. Whenever you think about a situation you might encounter, make a plan for how you will respond. When you are in a calm place with no outside influences or stresses, you’ll be able to think more clearly. Then you can decide what your true intention is, and plan a response that is inline with your values.
PRACTICE. Go over and over your plan until you can do it automatically. Think of it like a fire drill. The more you practice your response, the more comfortable you will be when it actually comes down to it.
PERFORM. When the situation arises, your response will be so hard-wired into your brain, that you’ll be able to respond with confidence. No need to feel frustrated and react on impulse.
Is there a situation in your life where you’d like to feel more confident?
Leave a comment and let me know your thoughts on this.
If you’re ready to replace the limiting thoughts with empowering beliefs, join me to Uncover Your Diamond, and live your life with passion and purpose.
I met Eva Love about two years ago and knew in an instant that we would become lifelong friends. She has a heart of gold and huge insight. Enjoy her story. Please Leave her a warm welcome and comment ~ Relationships were hard for me.
I dated a fair amount in high school, but it always felt “off.” Before I married at 17, to escape from my abusive Dad, I knew it was a mistake…though I don’t regret it because I have two amazing daughters. Picking the Rotten Apple Though I liked men, I wondered why I always picked the bad ones. After my first marriage, I was engaged four times! After the fourth break-up, I realized that the one thing all of these guys had in common was ME! So I decided that until I fixed my “picker” I’d forget men and just focus on my children and work. I obsessed about what I did wrong for 11 years before I married my second husband. He fit all my criteria: religion, education, height, build, family, and his last name was Love! We should have been good together, but that relationship was a total disaster. I felt like a complete failure. Again! Here I was 35 years old and divorced twice! I had horrendous guilt for the damage my second marriage caused my girls. I was so devastated, and deeply depressed, I planned my death.
Eva … Stop the Car As I rounded the corner to drive off a 1000-foot cliff, I heard a voice from deep inside say, “Eva, you’re sick. It’s like you have the flu. You’ll get well. Stop the car.” I’m so grateful I did. To heal my deep emotional wounds, I spent thousands of dollars trying different types of therapists, healers, workshops, study groups, churches and spiritual paths. Nothing helped! Not only was I miserable, but I made everyone around me miserable. One night in desperation, not knowing what else to do or where to turn, I cried out, “God, help me.” A quiet peace came over me, the weight of my agony lifted, and I knew everything would be all right.
The next day the techniques that I later named The Love Miracle System came to me. After using this system for only three weeks my life changed radically. I was truly happy. I was healing my relationships. I was learning to love myself! I was becoming a new Eva! My friends wanted to know what I was doing. My roommate asked me to teach her and a few others my system. After that first class, things snowballed. I was so busy nights and weekends teaching workshops and working privately with clients that nine months later I quit my high-level executive position.
Goodbye to the Corporate World I was working for a billion dollar national auto-parts chain, had two departments reporting to me, with a $5.5M budget. I was the only woman on the executive team, had a big, beautiful, top-floor corner office, nice salary, and all the perks! People thought I was crazy for leaving. I never looked back. As exciting as achieving that level of corporate success had been, it was completely unsatisfying compared to helping people out of their misery to find genuine happiness and love like they never knew they could have it. I was having the time of my life teaching classes and mentoring private clients, all by referral. (I never marketed or advertised.)
The Most Important Thing was Missing
Four years later, it looked like I had it all: beautiful home, snazzy sports car, loads of wonderful friends, lots of dates with fun guys, great income, exciting world travel, and an effervescent joy that bubbled up from within me. What I didn’t have — had never had — was a passionate, deeply committed union with the Love of My Life. Mama was Right! Mama always said, “The greatest thing in the world is to love and be loved.” Although I had lots of dates, I was lonely for “The One.” I didn’t believe I would ever marry again, yet the longing for someone to share my life and my deepest feelings, fears, hopes and dreams with kept getting stronger. I didn’t want to grow old alone.
Where was MY Prince?
One night after teaching a class, I noticed a gal who was radiant. In just 3 weeks she had attracted a gem of a guy. Though early in the relationship, I saw a solidness about them that gave me confidence it would last. Never having had that confidence in my own relationships, I asked, “Why can’t you do that for yourself?” That night I began working through the thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and resistance that were keeping me in superficial relationships with guys I’d never wanted to marry. Who was Keeping My Prince Away? I discovered I had never committed to myself. Rather, I’d always helped others make their lives better. By using my techniques, I became truly committed to myself. I committed to having the life I desired. A life with a partner I passionately loved, who passionately loved me, who wanted marriage – the Love of My Life! Instead of focusing on what I’d done wrong, I became a student of love, fabulous marriages, and healthy relationships.
My Prince Arrived
Shortly thereafter, I met my husband, Will. Seeing him across the room at a business conference, I was immediately attracted. That evening at dinner we sat only a table away from each other at the restaurant. Each time I looked over at him I caught him looking at me. After dinner he came by my table to introduce himself. He said, “There’s something about you that I find very interesting. I’d like to get to know you over the weekend if you’re open to that.” I was! And over the next two days in a crowd of 250 people, with no pre-planning, we continually found ourselves in the same places. I was smitten! So was he. We burned up the phone lines and made the airlines rich. (I lived in Scottsdale, AZ; he in San Diego, CA.)
Ready to Run!
About three months into it, I got scared. (This was an old pattern!) I called him and said, “I don’t want to see or hear from you again. Don’t ever call me.” He said, “No! What we have together is too good and we need to talk.” He sent me a plane ticket. The next day we sat face to face and talked for 11 straight hours. Will had also been studying relationships. He became my teacher. And I got it. Instead of running, I learned to stay, working though our disagreements, challenges and problems. We committed to keep our love for each other ‘front and center’ in our lives. And that is where it has stayed…it hasn’t always been easy, but it has always been worth it. My husband & I celebrating our 19th Wedding Anniversary.
More in Love than Ever!
We’ve been together for 21 (married 19) amazing and wonderful years. We’ve created a life together that is better than I ever thought possible. We learned a lot about each other and even more about ourselves. We gained enormous insight into how relationships really work (and don’t work!). As friends and family observed our relationship, they constantly asked us to share our secrets. They would say, “You give us hope.”
The Enemy of Love
It bothered us to see so much bad information in the media taking people down the road of disappointment and heartbreak. Men are taught how to seduce women but not create a real relationship in the process. Women were being taught to manipulate men. (In particular we think the book “The Rules” creates dysfunctional relationships that will end in divorce.) These and other popular ideas get traction in the media, but they are dead-end paths for those who longed for a loving, deeply committed relationship.
So Many Weddings and Baby Showers
Will, sharing my passion for helping build happy, loving, fulfilling relationships, wanted us to teach others how to create them. Our Magical Relationships Retreat, created in 2001, has helped hundreds of couples gain the tools and mind-set to create happy lasting relationships. Hundreds of singles have attracted the right mates for them, sealing the deal with marriage. We’re invited to so many weddings and baby showers we can’t attend them all.
Helping More Become Brides and Grooms
For the last 24 years the only way you could work with me to learn this system of creating a joyous, satisfying, loving relationship was to know one of my students. It was all by word of mouth – an exclusive club of sorts. Now, because I want to reach more people who want (but don’t have) their ‘Right One,’ I’m opening my work to the public. I’m not much on high tech. I like high touch. Recently I felt driven to use the Internet to take my work to the world, in spite of my resistance to all things technical. It’s extremely exciting to me to have the opportunity to get to know so many more people and to hear what’s in their hearts and on their minds. Every morning when I check my email I look forward to seeing who’s going to show up today, what I’m going to learn from them, and they from me.
Go to http://evalove.net/ to hear my Teleseminar “The 7 Heartbreaking Mistakes that Keep you Single!” May you be loved like never before, Eva
I’m so excited to share with you Dori Decarlo. Remember the radio show I was on? She is the Host!! You’ve got to read her exciting story…..
My story – how do I write my story…? Well, I was born a mom, I truly was. Growing up all I ever wanted was to get married and have babies. I know it seems funny now, but it is true. My three children are the most precious miracles in my life and everything I am is wrapped up in them and, hopefully, they will soar higher than I have ever dreamed.
I did things the right way, I got married and started having a family, but my husband and I just didn’t bring out the best in each other, and divorced when our children were 6, 4 and 2! Having been a stay at home mom while I was married, I did everything I could to be home with them. I waited on tables, did home health care so I could bring my daughter to work with me, cleaned an office at 5am when the kids slept at their dads and more, all so I could be at home with the children I dreamed of having.
As they grew, I was waiting on tables down the street from our home and 5 weeks before my 35th birthday I had a nightmare about being an 80 year old waitress, with a bee-hive hairdo and corrective shoes asking, “Do you want coffee with your scone daaaaling?” That very morning I gave my 2-weeks notice and my boss asked what I was going to do and I said, “I’m going to start a marketing company” and my life as a Mompreneur began!
In the beginning I designed collateral materials and wrote copy for websites (when we were working on a dial-up) and helped companies redefine their business model and strategies. It was interesting and exciting and gave me a wealth of experience in helping others shape their business. Then Columbine happened, and my Pastor had a call to discipleship and asked, “If you had a calling to make a difference in the lives of people you would never even know, could you risk everything to do it?” Well, I went home and began designing a line of clear bags and backpacks to keep guns and drugs out of schools and took the down payment I had saved for a house to start my business. DON’T EVER DO THAT!!!!
Buy the house, because then you have collateral – my kids are priceless to me – but banks don’t find any value in them! LOL
Safety First Bags – S1 for short – began and was growing at an amazing rate as I raised my kids. We were out of debt and getting ready to hit the world-wide arena when our factory made a mistake on a custom order I did that had nothing to do with our company – and it cost us $131,000.00 to fix. Yes that number is correct and it left us with $2000.00 in the bank and an empty warehouse! So…I earned my Ph,D in business so to speak, and picked myself up and put the company on the back shelf so we could regroup.
As this was going on, I was very active on social media, especially Twitter and met Linda Alexander and Debbie Barth and we started broadcasting on BlogTalkRadio with a show called, “The Three Wise Girls” and my radio days began. We shared all kinds of people and topics and I decided to do a 2-part segment on Mompreneurs, featuring some of the women I met on Twitter and after the second part, Linda called me and said I had found a niche and should do a show for women – and that is how Word of Mom Radio began…and the rest…as they say…is history!
Word of Mom Radio has given me the opportunity to share amazing Mompreneurs and business women building their businesses as they raise their families and support and encourage them in everything they do. I know what it is to have your family say, “When are you going to get a real job” and all the other “comforting” things to dissuade you from building your business, and I wanted to create a place to give women a voice and empower them as they make their dreams into reality.
The PS to the story is that we are rebranding our company, my children are now 26, 24 and 21 – on their own and I have been on the road with my radio show. We have gone from my show, The Mompreneur Model to 6 other shows: Social Media Help Not Hype, Managing Mompreneur Mayhem, Productive Play, Branding Beyond Blogging, and our Advocacy Alley – and have just created The Word of Mom Network by partnering with Empowered Woman Magazine and Radio – which will also be broadcasting under the “Word of Mom Radio” umbrella…so the dream continues to unfold. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought this would happen…all I was trying to do was give women a voice and we have now become a chorus!
Never forget that wonderful can happen when you least expect it and that you create your dreams one moment at a time…so dream on, my friends.
What a beautiful woman and inspiration. Deanna Waters. Be sure to checkout her exercise videos on youtube.
“It’s so easy to define ourselves by our business involvements, but of course that isn’t the whole story. Let me just begin by saying that I have enjoyed an incredible career in the communications field, as editor of a business magazine, been a television producer/director of a children’s program, director of communications and marketing for our city’s economic development corporation and I taught evening classes in business communications at our local college.
Now, together with my husband David, we are one of the top earners in an international network marketing business and have traveled to various countries on speaking tours. It all seems like a miracle, when I think of my upbringing, constantly dealing with a brave mother who had mental health issues. This caused me to escape the home as much as possible for sports and music activities, looking for acceptance and love on stage or on the track.
On the upside, that meant I became an achiever and also very aware that people are often fighting challenges behind the scenes and they need our patience and encouragement. I finally found my inner strength when the musical director of a national television program asked me to write lyrics for his show, called Hymn Sing. He figured that since I was a writer and sang in a choir, that would be a natural gift. However, I actually had no faith of my own. What was said from the church pulpit meant nothing to me personally.
I had come to a point of deep discouragement with myself and really didn’t know how I could go on living without an intervention by God, who was really a stranger to me at that time. My pastor just told me to “try harder” and where do you go from there? I picked up a book I had gotten from the church library but hadn’t bothered to read. It opened at the exact place where it directed me how to ask God for forgiveness and to invite the Lord Jesus Christ to take over control and to be my Lord and Savior.
As I read that, I was hit with a feeling like a bolt of lightening, but filled with love, from the top of my head throughout my body. As I prayed that prayer, I knew I was forgiven and that the very power of Christ was now with me. Like a neon sign, a vision of the words, Matthew 27:26 appeared and a voice that said, “I died in your place.” (That’s where the notorious Barabbas was released and Jesus went to the cross instead.) I knew that I didn’t deserve forgiveness, but Christ died that I could have a new life with His resources to be a better person. I often felt inspired by the Holy Spirit in the writing of the lyrics and later in writing and directing a Christian children’s television program for seven years, called “Follow Me”.
I marvel at how Jesus works so individually in each one of us. Each one is precious to Him. Should we fail and fall away in some way, He is ready to pick us up, forgive and empower us to live a better life. I am humbled and so thankful for His amazing love. I went on to write 100 sets of lyrics, all published, recorded and performed on national television. This is the creativity of God. Through the experience of having to learn about God and Jesus Christ, and also having a personal challenge to face, I had a dramatic encounter with Jesus, and surrendered my life to Him. That was totally life-changing.
To this day, I still have high expectations for myself, but they no longer require others to affirm me, and I am much more dedicated to make a real difference in the lives of people God puts in my path, whether for just a short conversation, or for a longer relationship. It’s an exciting journey. I am committed to help people make healthier choices in their lives in their diets, supplements and exercise, and at the same time, for those who would like to develop another stream of income, I love to coach them to believe in themselves and to recognize the gifts they have been given, to help others and in the process build a strong source of residual income.
I invite you to visit my blog and my website, should you know anyone who is searching for what I offer. God bless you in all you are doing to bless others in this short journey on earth!www.deannawatersblog.com and www.thewatersedge.com